Immortality

If nothing else tells the world what bipolar is, it the the ones (like me) who are obsessed with vampires. Vampires are as we all well know, immortal: meaning cannot die no matter what kind of mental anguish they are in. In the immortal words of Freddy Mercury, who wants to live forever? I look at vampires and fall in love with their immortality and that they in a way live many lives. But yet in my life I carry so much pain. I really don't think that they give vampires Lithium or Valium. I am not saying that after typing this I am going to throw out every vampire book, dvd, or other items and swear off them...not ever gonna happen. I am just saying that it is an odd choice and I am not alone in this. Look at the majority of true vampire fanatics..how many of them have issues such as depression or bibolar? Immortality would mean having to live forever with what is in my head. Having to watch everyone I ever care about grow old and die. Look at the Anne Rice novels or even Dracula...there was great pain carried with them into their immortal lives and they suffered terribly from it. One good point to being immortal would be that any suicide attempts, addictions, or self harm would be useless. But still, I can't stand my pain now and eventually I will die and the pain will end. Yes I will see loved ones die in my life, but it won't be all of them. I think that I would actually be a terrible vampire, I would have Lestat complaining about my whinning all the time. Perhaps the attraction to vampires is because of the ones that are able to completly forget their human lives as well as the feelings. I don't know, I am just reambling now. I had this thought and had to get it out of my head. FYI I am still in love with vampires and yes if offered I would still become one...who knows maybe it would be different.